How To Forgive
Forgiveness, how to let go of guilt shame and blame!
If you desire to Stop Pain, Anger, Depression, Resentment; then it is time to forgive.
There are many ways to accomplish Forgiveness, the following ways are my personal tools to move out through forgiveness to return to Love!
1. The Mental Choice of Forgiveness
2. The Soul Choice of Forgiveness
When we are in our mental bodies with Forgiveness our truth is:
a. We believe someone did us wrong. When we believe we have been
wronged and continue to hold someone, something and/or someplace
outside of ourselves accountable for the wrongdoing; it is no
different than drinking poison and expecting the other person to
die.
b. We believe we did something wrong to another. When we believe
we did something wrong to another, we simply drink the poison
fully knowing it will kill us.
We flip back and forth between believing someone did us wrong
versus we did something wrong to another.
Either belief stagnates us and eventually paralyzes us from
moving forward into the joyous feelings that allow us to live in
Heaven on Earth. To not forgive is the soulful death of us. We
stop our growth right in that moment of believing we were
wronged or did wrong.
To Forgive as defined in the dictionary:
1. To grant pardon for or remission of an offense, a debt, etc.;
to absolve
2. To give up all claim on account of; remit a debt, obligation,
etc.
3. To cease to feel resentment against another
4. To cancel an indebtedness or liability.
Ways to forgive: Stop blame and grant pardon
Absolve
Accept apology
Acquit
Allow for
Amnesty
Bear no malice
Bear with
Bury the hatchet
Clear
Commute
Condon
Dismiss from mind
Efface
Exculpate
Excuse
Exempt
Exonerate
Extenuate
Forget
Kiss and make up
Laugh off
Let bygones be bygones
Let it go
Let off easy
Let off
Let pass
Let up on
Make allowance
Overlook
Palliate
Pocket
Purge
Release
Relent
Remit
Reprieve
Respite
Think no more of
Turn other cheek
Wipe slate clean
Ways to Not Forgive:
Accuse
Blame
Censure
Charge
Punish
In the lists above there are a minimum of 40 ways to forgive
versus 5 ways to not forgive; and thusly comes the empowering
choice of growing by moving forward through forgiveness or
staying stagnant where your mind rots in blame and inflicting
punishment upon someone else or your self.
To choose to stymie our growth is choosing hell, it is choosing
fear and those choices perpetuate the vicious cycle of
non-acceptance, expressed through self-blame or projected blame
onto another. We accuse which then causes us to fearfully limit
our relationships through censuring them, unfortunately that is
nothing more than censuring our own lives as well. We charge
forward with judgment, engaging in making someone else or our
selves accountable and thusly the results are punishment of self
or punishment of others. Then shame follows which fuels the
fires of repeating the same negative outcome over and over
again.
To choose to grow is choosing heaven, it is choosing love, it is
choosing to move beyond critical judgment of self and all
others.
How beautiful to have an array of multiple options to be able to
free us through forgiveness so we may grow and move forward.
Out of the 40 options above, I personally prefer two "Dismiss
from mind and Release" (as in release the negative emotions
attached to your incorrect truth).
It is the mental body that is holding the incorrect truth (what
you have come to believe as a result of your fantasized negative
perception). This negative fantasy fuels the fear-based emotions
of anger, resentment and even hatred for another or for your
self. The mental body is what we have been conditioned to
believe; it is a taught behavior and does not even closely
resemble who you truly are; the Soul.
The Soul Choice:
The Soul and its divine expression, your magnificence, the
Spirit; is being held back if you choose to not forgive self or
others for what you believe you did to them or they to you.
The Soul needs not any teaching. The Soul does not need to
forgive, as it knows already there is no wrong doing on your
part or any one else's. The Soul knows it is has been gifted
free will and free choice. The Soul knows that the use of such a
great gift is to become aware through experience and is thusly
not punishable. The Soul engages in the use of the gift to
become aware of self as through experience it recalls what is
right for the soul and what is not right for the soul. The soul
knows this is individual choice and what is right for it, may
not be necessarily right for another in any given moment of
time.
As the soul remembers what is right for it, the soul does not
engage in anything that is harmful unto itself or another. Yet
the soul has been continuously oppressed by the mental body; so
how do we move from the lower mind limiting behavior to the
freedom of the expression of the soul.
II stated above I personally preferred two which lovingly
compliment one another.
1. Dismiss from the mind.
2. Release the negative emotions
You can dismiss from your mind, your mental body by realizing
the higher truth of the experience, what the soul knows already.
Ok, now most of you are probably thinking easier said then done.
The actual higher truth is that it is easier done than said,
because it takes far more time and precious energy to engage in
the mental debate. Many of those whom have worked with me on a
personal guidance level, already know the ease of going into
their hearts to dismiss incorrect truths, expressed through
limiting beliefs from their minds. (Do it yourself)
They are guided to meet directly with their soul and other souls
in the safe, nurturing, and loving place called the heart. Once
you are facilitated the first time, you have an empowering tool
that you can use whenever and wherever you choose in any moment
and do not need to be dependent upon another for your health and
well being.
As your facilitator I AM present as a guide until such time you
are confident in guiding yourself. This is vitally important so
that you are empowered with tools of independence by first
learning how to do it with the direction of someone who knows
the path and the pitfalls from experience.
What is really happening is that you are the real guide, the
higher aspect of you is the master and directs the facilitator
to guide you to your self and the highest truths of the soul you
are. The facilitator does not do it for you, they cannot any
more than they can show you how to breathe and then attempt to
breathe for you. It is far more empowering for you to realize
and feel the strength and courage of self by facing the self
limiting mental body with the divine love of self. This is
safely accomplished by following the guide who has embarked on
this trail numerous times. Once you are shown the way, you can
not only do it yourself, but guide others as well to freedom
through forgiveness.
Another tool I would like to share with you and can be easily
applied in any instant and can be practiced continually without
outside assistance; is the Violet Flame. The color of violet is
the energy of transmutation. It is the color to be used when you
wish to change a negative thought, feeling, situation and or
person, including yourself into the positive.
First you find or create for your self a comfortable place to
accomplish your mind freeing soul knowing play.
I use the word play because your mental body already has a
strong resistance to other words such as; exercise, work,
discipline etc. The mental body will attempt to stop you short
of even beginning by using your own negative connotation to
those words to manipulate you in not taking loving time for
yourself to be free from its limiting control.
Create a place to play and get to know your soul! It can be a
comfortable chair by a window where lots of sunlight can stream
in to ensure a sense of nurturing warmth, or somewhere out in
nature. I do suggest you make it as easy as possible for
yourself and simply move a chair by a window somewhere in your
home during a time you will not be distracted by the needs of
others sharing the home. You can always speak clearly by
explaining to those others, you are taking time for yourself for
the next 30 minutes or an hour and you chose to not be
interrupted.
You are responsible for doing loving things for yourself and if
you set yourself up for the risk of being interrupted by not
communicating clearlng you will be also setting yourself up for
yet another experience that you are negatively holding self or
another accountable for.
1. Sit in your chair
2. Close your eyes
3. Imagine a cylinder shaped tube of brilliant violet light.
Expand the tube so that more than one person can stand within
it.
4. Call in the person; place or thing that you perceive is
presenting the challenge.
5. Invite them to step into the violet light.
6. You step in after them.
7. The two of you stand face to face. At first you or they may
not be willing to look into one another's eyes. Don't be
concerned, just stand there.
8. Allow the violet light to fill up your entire body, by
breathing it in continuously. In this example, the other will
begin to do the same.
9. Stay in the light for at least 15 minutes until you feel you
have completely absorbed the violet light within you and you
have witnessed the other doing the same. You will know this is
complete when all the violet light turns to brilliant white
light.
10. Now look each other in the eyes; this will now be easier as
all the negative thoughts and feelings regarding self-imposed
and/or projected accountability are gone due to the violet light
transmuting the negativity into the positive.
11. Thank one another for showing up to clear the mental bodies
of one another with the love and knowingness of the souls of one
another.
12. You can kiss, hug or whatever feels lovingly appropriate, as
you remember you are the same and there is no judgment of the
self or projected upon any other. You will be able to do so
because while in the tube as you were breathing in the violet
light, the clarity of the higher truth was revealed to you and
the lower mental body was dismissed, right after you allowed
your self to scream, cry, blame and feel shame. The emotions are
an over lay of the thoughts; as such the more engaged you are in
the negative emotions, the less ability you have to see and know
clearly what is really going on. In the tube you get to express
those emotions without harm to self or the other.
13. Step out of the tube but take the white light with you for
the rest of your day.
You can practice this each and every day, it may be with the
same person for a long lasting challenge or you can do it in an
instant when you recognize a new challenge arising.
I personally used this incredible tool for six months straight
when facing a divorce. I was stuck in believing something was
being done to me and I my initial anger and resentment had
escalated to raging hatred for my estranged husband and his new
girlfriend; who now not only wanted him and the business we had
spent 10 years building together, she wanted my home as well.
We had attorneys that were costing a great deal of money and it
was apparent there would be no friendly settlement, we were
fully engaged in war and preparing for battle in a courtroom.
My days were consumed with blame. This type of behavior and the
accompanied feelings were less than what I previously said I
desired. My negative emotions were guiding me to my fearful
negative fantasized thoughts that were projecting an outcome of
complete loss and devastation; and thusly I became aware of the
choice at hand.
I had chosen long before this to be at peace, to be in love and
to live in heaven. What I was presently involved in was stress,
nasty feeling emotions and thoughts of revenge at any cost.
What I needed was to choose heaven again and my pathway there
and ticket in was through forgiveness. I knew I needed to
forgive him for what ever I believed he did to me, that was
playing out in the expression of believing I was betrayed,
abandoned and rejected and more importantly I had to forgive
myself for creating the situation that was a direct reflection
of believing I was less than and that I deserved nothing more
than what I was getting from him. I had to give to myself before
I could expect another to give to me; thusly the fore-giving!
I did an extremely self-loving thing in that moment, I called
out for help. St. Germaine responded by speaking to me through a
book written by another. In those written words, I learned of
the tool of using the violet light to help me forgive my
estranged husband, his girlfriend and myself.
I used this violet light diligently for six months, no matter
what it looked like or how they continued to behave on the
outside and especially when I was tempted to reengage in fear.
One week before the court case, I was driving in town and as I
looked in my rear view mirror, I saw my estranged husband
following me. He continued to follow me right to my office and
parked right behind me so that I could not escape the encounter.
I stepped from my car remembering the violet light. I
immediately noticed his softened appearance more than apparent
from the tears over flowing from his eyes. He asked to speak
with me, promising it would not take long.
In that meeting agreed upon in that very moment, he admitted his
negative behavior and how it was not behavior consistent with
who he truly was. It was not in accordance with his loving soul.
He asked for my forgiveness as he handed to me, the signed deed
to our home, giving me sole ownership, as well as a check for
the full amount of money he had initially agreed upon, yet had
withheld from me during our separation. He then requested we
agree to call off the court battle; behaving as two people in
love rather than in fear, so we could stop damaging ourselves
and one another out of the fear of loss and lack. He desired for
us to forgive one another so we could remain friends according
to our loving souls rather than have some judge in a lower court
of life determine and order us to take action we already knew
was the right and loving thing to do.
I knew in that moment that my choice to follow by my willingness
to forgive him, as well as myself for perceived wrongdoing, was
the magic applied through the extra help of the tool of the
violet light that freed us both on all levels to move forward in
our lives.
Although we do not live together any longer and only see each
other occasionally, each encounter is with total and absolute
love gained through the choice of seeing that it was truly time
for both of us to move on in our lives. He is thriving and so AM I in our individual expressions of the
knowingness of the souls we are where forgiveness for ourselves
and/or forgiveness for the other in that situation was necessary
only in terms of engaging in the process that would allow us to
dismiss the illusion from our mental bodies so we could clearly
see the soulful truth of one another.
Forgiveness itself from the soul's higher truth is that there
was never anything to forgive; we were both simply remembering
through experience what was right for us as souls so we could
return to the all-embracing love of the ONE!
In light with love from heaven on earth
Eloryia
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